Aristotle's Superhawk

Can the value of a vehicle exceed the sum of it's parts? Potentially although questionable in this instance considering that the parts utilised were literally garbage found on the street.

• The Bike>

The Honda CB400 has been in continuous production in one form or another since the mid seventies and at the point of writing shows no signs of stopping any time soon. Over this time literally hundreds of variations have existed from the iconic two speed Honda'matic as seen on the cover to Prince's Purple Rain album through to six speed, steroid fueled four cylinder pocket rockets. With Honda producing variants for specific continents on a yearly basis it can become a little tricky to correctly identify the exact model and this bike was no exception with it's pre-1985 7 digit VIN number. Looking at the qualities of this bike such as twin disk brakes, a six speed gearbox and mechanic tachometer it was obvious that this was either a very rare Japanese import or some kind of mangled Frankenstein's monster of several Australian domestic market models. Which one it was I guess I will never know but I have my suspicions *cough* monstrous mess of several bikes.

• The Plan>

Transform this rusting wreckage into something cool within a budget of less than $100. Let's get real, this particular CB400 was barely worth the space in which it take took up in my shed. It's rotting seat was literally held to the frame with pipecleaners, it leaked oil from components that have no direct access to oil flow - even it's mirrors didn't reflect properly "is a mirror a mirror if it doesn't mirror?" The cost of a complete strip down rebuild would never be recoverable, in fact, the cost of any form of paint would be overly indulgent for a ride of this caliber, so how does one polish a turd that may crumble into non existence if polished too hard?

• Solution>

After several hours spent drinking whilst glaring at this Honda with the malice and confusion of a three year old who has just been told that they cant eat candy for breakfast by their favorite cool relative, I came to the conclusion that embracing and even highlighting the shittiest qualities was the way to go.

• Implementation>

Remove absolutely everything labeled unnecessary and even some components that many would consider to be crucial. Find a seat in the form of a scrap piece of plywood upholstered in an old vinyl jacket (upgraded to a Chinese vinyl rear hump style seat stolen from a written off wreck) and grind off any structural integrity supporting braces which inhibit the fitting of a new seat.
Grind approximately 5 layers of house paint and several litres of auto filler/primer from the tank, now leave it, coz fuck it, let it rust. Cut the fender and find somewhere to mount mirrors "forks FTW" put on a salvaged speedometer reading 50,000 km less than the factory unit. Spend forever removing the standard airbox and then connect pod filters using a section of PVC down pipe from the neighbors guttering. Great, you're done. Now take a step back and realise that you've now got no available space to mount the battery "which is pretty important for a bike without a kick start" so just strap it to the side with a section of your favorite belt which happened to snap the week before from ten years of abuse. Finish it off with some straight steel tube for handlebars, some sort of muffler from the local automotive store dumpster and dump in a bit of the ancient fuel that you reserved from draining the tank.

Hindsight: I will forever have a special space in my heart for this motorcycle however, whilst reflecting on my time with it prior to it's sale to an interstate buyer, I realised that the only factor that actually made it a cool bike was the fact that it was so dangerous, riding it was literally asking for death. No brakes no problems, electrocute your leg on a battery #YOLO, check the mirrors and admire your knees - sweet.